Chinese Work Ethic Sunny Fong

Men's fashion carnage etcetera in all its naked glory…

Tag: miley cyrus

Ching Chong Charlie

Sometimes my eyes are so slitty during really sunny days, I bang into little kids on the street or I hit my head on tree branches.


Weapons of Mass Destruction

The 81st Blah-cademy Awards..

And the award for the best dressed biatch last night at Hollywood biggest circle jerk goes to:

Alicia Keys in Armani Prive. I’m glad this sista didn’t wear some tacky piece of “I’m from Queens and proud of it” like Beyonce always does at every award show. Yes, we know you’re black. Yes, we know you’ve got long fingernails. Yes, we know you like shiny things. But no, you don’t have to look like what the cast of 227 would wear to church on a Sunday. Alicia looked so good last night… I think it moved.

It was nice to see Amy Winehouse get out of the house.

By the way, do all the designers meet at the top of the Statue of Liberty once a season to consult about what they’re ALL going to do for the Oscars?
This is their chance to do something creative, elegant and unique.. And it seems that everyone wanted to throw together an asymmetrical lacey Mondrian meets melting clocks mess.

Inspirations for this year: lace, blue, ribbons, bands, asymmetry and the plastic table cloths at dim sum.

I think Project Runway actually had an influence on the real fashion houses like Galliano, YSL and Prada. That’s kinda scary! Nice going, Rami. Speaking of which, I haven’t seen the Oscars in years but why was Joan bumped from the pre-show? Tim Gunn is just way too nice to everyone.

Freida Pinto from Slumdog was NOT wearing Oscar De La Renta as originally reported but she was in a lacy, messy John Galliano frock that frankly looked like she purchased it at Kumar’s Indian Bazaar on 25th and 3rd.

Quick fact: Pinto was wearing a 150 year-old Indian diamond.

And co-star Dev Patel, was crazy dapper in a Burberry Prosum suit.

I heard Jessica Biel was running around Fred Leighton trying to figure out what to wear at the last minute. But I think she shouldn’t have listened to her boyfriend’s suggestion to “just wear my penis costume from last Halloween…”

Miley Cyrus, who attended for Bolt , wore a Zuhair Murad “couture” dress constructed by 32 Chinese seamstresses. Her one stipulation for the designer was that the beading had to be pure crystal. I heard that the atelier was so bright from all the crystals shimmering under the studio lights that all 32 Chinese seamstresses had to dress her with their eyes squinted to avoid all the blinding specks of light.

Miley was a good sport though during her final fitting and followed suit by pulling her eyes back with her fingers to block the reflecting lights. She was also heard commenting on how “goofy” all the Chinese workers looked with their squinty eyes.

But on a serious note, who gives a shit who wore what when Slumdog Millionaire won Best Picture!

Jai ho, Danny Boyle! Former ravers everywhere rejoice!

Why do Asians love Burberry so much?

This is the worst Burberry item I’ve ever seen. It’s soooooooooooo Asian.

It’s so Asian, I bet the saleswoman at Holt’s probably gave him the ching chong Miley Cyrus eyes when he turned to walk away from the cash.

On a related note, I too wore Burberry like a hypocrite to the same bar. It was a quiet Tuesday night and I got actually got on stage to sing karaoke in front of about 20 gay guys and their hags. Of course, I did Bobby Darin’s Mack The Knife, one of my favourite songs of all time.

Some guy grabbed me on the patio and did a magic trick with my hands where he dotted one hand with cigarette ash, closed both hands and then when I opened them, the ash stain was on the other hand. I was thoroughly impressed! Hence, why I’m doing the stigmata pose. Too bad he wasn’t attractive but a total queen with smelly hair because I would love to date a guy who does magic tricks all the time. Magic tricks remind me of businessmen in 1950’s New York with their watch fobs, sitting at a bar trying to impress a lady.

And yes, this is the custom made coat that my grandfather had made but never wore.

It’s always the quiet ones…

George Harrison: Knock knock.
Paul McCartney: Who’s there?
GH: Avant garde.
PM: Avant garde who?
GH: Avant garde an idea!


Speaking of Miley Cryrus and great avant garde music:

Enjoy. I’m going to bed (not really).

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