Chinese Work Ethic Sunny Fong

Men's fashion carnage etcetera in all its naked glory…

Tag: justin timberlake

Ugh, Jay-Z Sucks

Official Suit and Tie video released. Directed by David Fincher. JT is aging very well.
Jay-Z kinda ruins everything.


Oscar Aftermath

Here’s a quick look at a few of the fellas at the Vanity Fair afterparty hosted by Graydon Carter (Editor).

I’m starting to really like 50 Cent. Kanye’s all in people’s faces but 50 Cent is slowly becoming the much more cooler guy in the background without any identity crises to wax poetic about. Just chillin’.

Tom Ford looked incredibly smart in his one-button velvet jacket in a subtle enough blue to be formal but stand out in the crowd of penguins. This get-up is very him. I think he looks fantastic and I give him the Best Dressed nod.

Inside the Sunset, Jake Gyllenhaal and 50 Cent did some whiskey shots and then apparently performed a mutual jerkoff session in one of the private VIP restrooms. Or at least that’s what my sources say. And when I say sources, I mean my perverted brain.

Speaking of sword fights, doesn’t Anderson Cooper look absolutely giggly next to his hunky boytoy? Listen old guy, you’re kinda killin’ the hot guy buzz here.

Looks like Jude never fixed his bowtie even at the afterparty. Jude is so good looking, he’s one of the only actors who can get away with fucking his nanny and still seem like a really nice guy.

Ya know, it’s really hard to take your usual wardrobe and actually translate it to the Academy Awards. But I’ll give it to the Biebs this time since he has been getting so much hate lately. Abortions shmabortions, Justin!

I’m done with JT. He’s smug, obnoxious and walks around like he’s God’s gift to the arts. I thought he was horrible in The Social Network but I’d still lick his taint. I just want to fuck his mouth so he’d shut the fuck up.

I’m not sure which slut accompanied him (I don’t really look at females all that much) but the top of her dress is very interesting and flattering. I’m mostly jealous that she knows what JT’s cum tastes like. So unfair.

And for the hell of it, here are a few obligatory trainwreck Worst Dressed contenders:

Madonna showed up before heading to her own afterafterparty at her Manager’s home (co-hosted with Demi) looking trampier than her 14-year-old daughter. Big points off for the very un-PC fur detail. Unless it’s made out of Carlos Leon’s pubic hair.

What has Rita Wilson done other than wear tacky expensive clothing all the time and blow Tom Hanks? She is the epitome of celebrity style: tasteless, fake and unoriginal.

It’s the Oscars, not the opening night of a new Persian restaurant.

Joan Collins still looking like a widow who obviously killed her rich husband but no one dares to say anything. 1987 called, Joan.

I don’t even know who this is. Is she from Gossip Girl or that show Glee? Anyway, I just vomited in my own mouth. Hands down, the worst outfit all night.

And because I have to watch some Law & Order now, I’ll leave you with this again because I love it so much:

Justin Timberklake is gay

This is what I have to do too when I drive home afterwards.
Can’t get your poo finger on the steering wheel.

Justin Timberlake is gay

He’s on top of the world, eh?
Hopefully, he’ll get on top of me.


Justin Timberlake is gay

The evidence is mounting.

Hehe… “Mounting…”

Justin Timberlake is gay

Maybe if we say it enough, it will happen.

Justin Timberlake is gay

Justin Timberlake is gay…

Happy Mother’s Day!

Justin Timberlake is gay

Because I’m taking a break from hating Toronto, I’m doing something new…

Justin Timberlake is gay.

Met Costume Gala 2009

The Metropolitan Costume Gala was always the #1 A-list fantasy event for me (next to wing night at Wild Wings), even over the Academy Awards. The Oscars are normally a parade of dull, conformist InStyle cover actresses and their trophy husbands. But I always look forward to getting my issue of Vogue to look at photos of the gala’s decor (the French garden theme was one of my favourites), read about the menu and for once, drool over celebrity and the fashion superstar attendees (one of my pet peeves are random celebrities in Vogue instead of models). There was always Tom Ford, Suzy, Ingrid Sischy, Stella Tennant, Karl Lagerfeld, Amber Valetta, Stella McCartney and maybe throw in a gaggle of young indie starlets or Justin Timberlake (before he got annoyingly arrogant).

But this year’s Model as Muse gala just seems more like a celebrity fuckfest than ever. I’m sure it’s still incredibly fabulous but it’s really sad how celebrities are beloved only because they’re famous. It’s almost as if we don’t give two shits about what made them famous. Sometimes when things are too A-list, it becomes kinda… b-list. Sorta loses its cool, ya know? One of my favourite stories is when Jennifer Lopez wasn’t allowed into one of Versace’s party. Gone are the days of good ol’ fashion world snobbery. Now every fucking hacky top 40 artist and football player can just shimmy into these shindigs.

Lose the Kelly Osbourne’s, Katy Perry’s and Rihanna’s. Give me Naomi Campbell glaring at Robert DeNiro from across the Aztec exhibit. Marc Jacobs making out with his new hunky honeybuns on the steps. Valentino’s eyebrows falling off and landing into his flan. Sofia Coppola smoking with Chanel, Karen Elson and Aerin Lauder in the puffer’s area. Sophie Dahl pushing around her brioche.

Anyway, here’s a few red carpet photos of the Met Gala carnage…

First of all, a serious comment: Tom Brady’s pants are way too baggy. I like that Gisele is such a frigid bitch that she won’t even look below his waist to notice that he’s wearing Canali hammer pants.
Second of all, can you imagine the dinner conversation between these two? I like this bread. I like this table… I like that door.
If I wasn’t so lazy, I’d Photoshop two thought bubbles coming out of their heads with nothing in them.

Who let Mia Farrow’s maid off her leash and into a lycra blend dress? Back to scraping the baseboards in the den, Guadalupe!

I didn’t realize there was a pre-dinnerWho Looks The Most Miserable Contest. Someone call Fran Leibovitz over.

Like sister, like sister? Recent reports have revealed that Ashley Olsen has taken after MK and joined the Eating Disorder Club. Look at how her body is literally shrinking away from her dress as she walks up the Met stairs. She had disappeared so much after dinner that Jesus Luz mistakenly had a whole conversation with a dining chair seat cover.

Is it me or is Michael Jackson’s skin just getting whiter and whiter?

Anna Wintour is killing two birds with one dress. After the gala, she headed to a midnight madness screening at the New York Hentai Festival at NYU’s Student Union Lounge. Who knew the Editor-at-Large was so into tentacle rape?

Who is this? Jessica Swank? Or Katy Lively or whatever? Whoever it is, your date looks like an infant.

I think it’s kinda neat that Madonna looks like she’s doing a couture version of Borderline:

But really, everyone has been saying how she’s all recovered from her recent fall off her horse but does this look like a woman who has recovered from a fall?

I always thought Djimon Hounsou was a bit of an intellectual so it’s kinda surprising to see him following this former vapid Creative Director/reality show diva for Baby Phat around like a little puppy dog. She has him more whipped than when he was in Amistad.

Hopefully, they’ll reconsider the invite list next year and do a little more weeding of the lameasses.

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